"I quit" And with that the babysitter gave her notice - referencing the challenges presented by my younger daughter's behavior. Ever since the kids dad disappeared six months ago- the five year old had run through babysitters with increasingly hostile behaviors. A problem- given I was the only means of support for our family of three and needed to work six days a week. And I was aware of, and worried about, her behavior. The therapy I was paying for to help them deal with the loss of their Dad was not covered by insurance, nor was it cheap, and there were no quick fixes to having your Dad leave your life without any notice. Costs were high - actual and emotional- as my kids were both under the age of seven with serious medical issues. And that was before their dad went AWOL.
Despite having bronchitis, triggered by an immune system suppressed by steroids to reduce swelling for a severe spine injury- I felt optimistic. The stomach flu that hijacked my morning and day assured me that I would be on track for my weight loss goals despite the high doses of prednisone in the preceding weeks and I was taking silver linings where I found them. Working out was my solace and despite the days at Children's Hospital and sleepless nights of billing client hours - I found a sense of balance in training for competition.
OK - so here is the part of the bad Oprah story where I either invent "white-out", some new kind of "mommy-must-have"like cunning diaper cover, or do something heroic. Instead, I want to drink red wine and watch Sean Penn movies.